Products

 

Made with 100% cotton twill for high-end comfort and durability, these custom distressed hats bring all the style and practicality one needs in daily life. The low profile along with the D-ring closure on a self-fabric hideaway strap ensures both proper protection from the sun and that perfect, adjustable fit.

Please note: Small details and letters within 1/2 inch of the seam line should be avoided due to the nature of DTF printing. Small prints may lift from the fabric. Prefer wider logos and images, or ensure text has a sufficient background to improve adhesion.

.: 100% cotton twill
.: Sewn-in label
.: Closure: self-fabric hideaway strap with metal D-ring slider
.: Printed using Direct to Film (DTF) technology
.: Please note: Due to a special finishing process, distress and color may vary

A true statement piece that is sure to become a wardrobe staple. Hostile. Assertive. And sure to give you the confidence to keep fighting the good fight. Or the bad fight idk you.

.: 100% cotton (fiber content may vary for different colors)
.: Medium fabric (6.0 oz/yd² (203 g/m²))
.: Classic fit
.: Tear-away label
.: Runs bigger than usual

Channel your inner Karen

.: Made with 100% ring-spun cotton, a lightweight fabric (4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²)), this unisex t-shirt feels like a bliss to wear all year round.
.: The classic fit with the crew neckline deliver a clean, versatile style that can match any occasion, whether it's formal or semi-formal.
.: All shirts feature a pearlized, tear-away label for total wearing comfort.
.: Made using ethically grown and harvested US cotton. Gildan is also a proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol ensuring ethical and sustainable means of production. This blank tee is certified by Oeko-Tex for safety and quality assurance.
.: Fabric blends: Heather colors - 35% ring-spun cotton, 65% polyester; Sport Grey - 90% cotton, 10% polyester.

The unisex soft-style t-shirt puts a new spin on casual comfort. Made from very soft materials, this tee is 100% cotton for solid colors. Heather colors and sports grey include polyester. The shoulders have twill tape for improved durability. There are no side seams. The collar is made with ribbed knitting to prevent curling damage.

.: Made with 100% ring-spun cotton, a lightweight fabric (4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²)), this unisex t-shirt feels like a bliss to wear all year round.
.: The classic fit with the crew neckline deliver a clean, versatile style that can match any occasion, whether it's formal or semi-formal.
.: All shirts feature a pearlized, tear-away label for total wearing comfort.
.: Made using ethically grown and harvested US cotton. Gildan is also a proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol ensuring ethical and sustainable means of production. This blank tee is certified by Oeko-Tex for safety and quality assurance.
.: Fabric blends: Heather colors - 35% ring-spun cotton, 65% polyester; Sport Grey - 90% cotton, 10% polyester.

Rest in Piss

This unisex ultra cotton tee is a classic. Quality cotton construction means that designs are sure to shine. The shoulders are tapped for a good upper-body fit. There are no side seams, ensuring a clean, unbroken flow. The collar has ribbed knitting for improved elasticity. The materials that went into this product are sustainably sourced and economically friendly.

.: This unisex tee is an excellent, all-season wear thanks to its medium fabric (6.0 oz/yd² (203 g/m²)). Made with 100% US cotton, this tee guarantees long-lasting comfort and style.
.: The classic fit along with the crew neckline make it a highly versatile choice for casual and semi-formal occasions as its neat, clean looks can blend in any setting and are perfect for accessorizing.
.: Made using 100% US cotton that is ethically grown and harvested. Gildan is also a proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol ensuring ethical and sustainable means of production. This blank tee is certified by Oeko-Tex for safety and quality assurance.
.: The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations and provides a scratch-free wearing experience.
.: Fabric Blends: Ash Grey - 99% cotton, 1% polyester, Heather Colors & Safety Colors - 50% cotton, 50% polyester, Antique Colors & Sport Grey - 90% cotton, 10% polyester

Rest in Piss

 

This unisex ultra cotton tee is a classic. Quality cotton construction means that designs are sure to shine. The shoulders are tapped for a good upper-body fit. There are no side seams, ensuring a clean, unbroken flow. The collar has ribbed knitting for improved elasticity. The materials that went into this product are sustainably sourced and economically friendly.

.: This unisex tee is an excellent, all-season wear thanks to its medium fabric (6.0 oz/yd² (203 g/m²)). Made with 100% US cotton, this tee guarantees long-lasting comfort and style.
.: The classic fit along with the crew neckline make it a highly versatile choice for casual and semi-formal occasions as its neat, clean looks can blend in any setting and are perfect for accessorizing.
.: Made using 100% US cotton that is ethically grown and harvested. Gildan is also a proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol ensuring ethical and sustainable means of production. This blank tee is certified by Oeko-Tex for safety and quality assurance.
.: The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations and provides a scratch-free wearing experience.
.: Fabric Blends: Ash Grey - 99% cotton, 1% polyester, Heather Colors & Safety Colors - 50% cotton, 50% polyester, Antique Colors & Sport Grey - 90% cotton, 10% polyester

ily more than

Brad hates everything. Happy Valentine's Day.

_________________________________________________________________________

 

Send this digital download with vicious Brad to your bestie, the love of your life, or just and acquaintance idk.

This is a digital download, so you will need to download it and send it to your sweetheart.

Thank you for supporting the farm! We all love you (except for Brad)

We love a consistent queen.

.: Made with 100% ring-spun cotton, a lightweight fabric (4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²)), this unisex t-shirt feels like a bliss to wear all year round.
.: The classic fit with the crew neckline deliver a clean, versatile style that can match any occasion, whether it's formal or semi-formal.
.: All shirts feature a pearlized, tear-away label for total wearing comfort.
.: Made using ethically grown and harvested US cotton. Gildan is also a proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol ensuring ethical and sustainable means of production. This blank tee is certified by Oeko-Tex for safety and quality assurance.
.: Fabric blends: Heather colors - 35% ring-spun cotton, 65% polyester; Sport Grey and Antique colors - 90% cotton, 10% polyester, Graphite Heather - 50% ring-spun cotton, 50% polyester

We love a consistent queen.

.: Made with 100% ring-spun cotton, a lightweight fabric (4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²)), this unisex t-shirt feels like a bliss to wear all year round.
.: The classic fit with the crew neckline deliver a clean, versatile style that can match any occasion, whether it's formal or semi-formal.
.: All shirts feature a pearlized, tear-away label for total wearing comfort.
.: Made using ethically grown and harvested US cotton. Gildan is also a proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol ensuring ethical and sustainable means of production. This blank tee is certified by Oeko-Tex for safety and quality assurance.
.: Fabric blends: Heather colors - 35% ring-spun cotton, 65% polyester; Sport Grey and Antique colors - 90% cotton, 10% polyester, Graphite Heather - 50% ring-spun cotton, 50% polyester

Thank you so brain cell donation, and although the transplant was an unmitigated failure in every possible way, it's the thought that counts. Unless you're Michael. He hasn't had a thought since 1993, bless his heart.

.: 100% ring-spun cotton (fiber content may vary for different colors)
.: Light fabric (4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²))
.: Eurofit
.: Tear-away label
.: Runs true to size

Crowdfunding a braincell for this poor sweet thing

.: 100% ring-spun cotton (fiber content may vary for different colors)
.: Light fabric (4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²))
.: Eurofit
.: Tear-away label
.: Runs true to size

Thank you so brain cell donation, and although the transplant was an unmitigated failure in every possible way, it's the thought that counts. Unless you're Michael. He hasn't had a thought since 1993, bless his heart.

.: 100% ring-spun cotton (fiber content may vary for different colors)
.: Light fabric (4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²))
.: Eurofit
.: Tear-away label
.: Runs true to size

"Quit being a silly goose" - a person you don't need in your life.

Gary Gusey, esteemed attourney and passionate advocate for Silly Gooses everywhere, would like to thank you for your time and attention to this matter. The price of this hoodie should cover most of his retainer fee. The rest can go on the bill.

.: Made with a medium-heavy fabric (8.0 oz/yd² (271 g/m²)) that consists of 50% cotton and 50% polyester for that cozy feel and warmth you need in a hoodie.
.: The classic fit along with the pouch pocket and the tear-away label make for a highly comfortable, scratch-free wearing experience.
.: The color-matched drawcord and the double-lined hood add a stylish flair and durability that tie everything together.
.: Made using 100% ethically grown US cotton. Gildan is also a proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol ensuring ethical and sustainable means of production. The blank tee's dyes are OEKO-TEX-certified dyes with low environmental impact.
.: Fabric blends: Heather Sport colors - 60% polyester, 40% cotton

"Quit being a silly goose" - a person you don't need in your life.

Gary Gusey, esteemed attourney and passionate advocate for Silly Gooses everywhere, would like to thank you for your time and attention to this matter. The price of this hoodie should cover most of his retainer fee. The rest can go on the bill. 

.: Made with 100% ring-spun cotton, a lightweight fabric (4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²)), this unisex t-shirt feels like a bliss to wear all year round.
.: The classic fit with the crew neckline deliver a clean, versatile style that can match any occasion, whether it's formal or semi-formal.
.: All shirts feature a pearlized, tear-away label for total wearing comfort.
.: Made using ethically grown and harvested US cotton. Gildan is also a proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol ensuring ethical and sustainable means of production. This blank tee is certified by Oeko-Tex for safety and quality assurance.
.: Fabric blends: Heather colors - 35% ring-spun cotton, 65% polyester; Sport Grey - 90% cotton, 10% polyester.

I have a special Valentine's Day message for you

...You give me Gary Goosebumps

_________________________________________________________________________

 

Send this digital download with Gary Gusey to your bestie, the love of your life, or just and acquaintance idk.

This is a digital download, so you will need to download it and send it to your sweetheart.

Thank you for supporting the farm! We all love you (except for Brad)

Enjoy a delightful aray of Useless Farm stickers! 

.: Material: water-resistant vinyl
.: Suitable for indoor and short-term outdoor use
.: Quantity: one sheet per listing
.: Assembled in the USA from globally sourced parts

Description: AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

NB! Due to variations in the production process, blankets may arrive up to 3" shorter than their listed size.

.: 100% polyester (SPOKE) or 83% Polyester and 17% Spandex (Miami Sublimation)
.: Your print goes on one side of the blanket in high detail and vibrant color
.: Medium heavy-weight fabric (8.85 oz/yd² (300 g/m²)) that feels extra soft to the touch (thickness of the fabric may slightly vary)

Roses are red, Violets are blue,

I could never be e-me

without e-mu

_________________________________________________________________________

 

Send this digital download with snappy Karen to your bestie, the love of your life, or just and acquaintance idk. 

This is a digital download, so you will need to download it and send it to your sweetheart.

Thank you for supporting the farm! We all love you (except for Brad)

Keith was nervous to put this on the website but wants to know how bad your anxiety is today. I'm a solid Keith.

A unisex heavy blend hooded sweatshirt is relaxation itself. The material is a thick blend of cotton and polyester. This makes for a plush, soft feel alongside warmth. A spacious kangaroo pocket hangs in front. The hood's drawstring is the same color as the base sweater.

.: 50% Cotton 50% Polyester
.: Medium-heavy fabric (8.0 oz/yd² (271.25 g/m²))
.: Classic fit
.: Sewn in label
.: Runs true to size

Keith was nervous to put this on the website but wants to know how bad your anxiety is today. I'm a solid Keith.

 

This classic unisex jersey short sleeve tee fits like a well-loved favorite.

.: 100% Airlume combed and ringspun cotton (fiber content may vary for different colors)
.: Light fabric (4.2 oz/yd² (142 g/m²))
.: Retail fit
.: Tear away label
.: Runs true to size

Supply chain issues in the leg delivery shipments are the #1 cause of loafing 

.: Made with 100% ring-spun cotton, a lightweight fabric (4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²)), this unisex t-shirt feels like a bliss to wear all year round.
.: The classic fit with the crew neckline deliver a clean, versatile style that can match any occasion, whether it's formal or semi-formal.
.: All shirts feature a pearlized, tear-away label for total wearing comfort.
.: Made using ethically grown and harvested US cotton. Gildan is also a proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol ensuring ethical and sustainable means of production. This blank tee is certified by Oeko-Tex for safety and quality assurance.
.: Fabric blends: Heather colors - 35% ring-spun cotton, 65% polyester; Sport Grey and Antique colors - 90% cotton, 10% polyester, Graphite Heather - 50% ring-spun cotton, 50% polyester